Monthly Archives: July 2004

Anorexic Olsen Released

Mary Kate Olson, who had been placed in a eating disorder clinic last month, has been declared 100% cured. Reporters waited outside on the hospital steps hoping to get a glimpse of the twin for the first time since her … Continue reading

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John Chooses John, Not John

A couple of months ago some hoped that John would choose John as his running mate. But today John named John as his running mate for the 2004 election. “Together, I and John will take America Back,” John told reporters … Continue reading

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Hussein Court Quotes

By now we’ve all heard the infamous quotes that have come out of the Hussein trial such as, “(I’ve got) millions stashed away,” and, “Careful, I’m an old man.” But here are some lesser heard quotes: After asking if he’d … Continue reading

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